condommodel:

check out this picture of a floating head

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stacksbreadup:

This deadass the funniest tweet ever.

stacksbreadup:

This deadass the funniest tweet ever.

sorryforsmartlyblogging:

merry-i-am:

salma:

why can’t hurricane names be culturally diverse

hurricane muhammad

hurricane shaniqua 

hurricane nguyen 

because white people destroy everything.

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thesociallyawkwardasian:

THE BEST THING IN THE WORLD IS SEEING PEOPLE SMILING BECAUSE OF YOU 

thejunglenook:

ballpointpun:

Somewhere a rocket scientist brain surgeon physicist with a knack for economics who wears Velcro shoes is having a stress breakdown.

When I was a professional ballroom dance instructor, one of my coworkers was having a tough time teaching a step to her student. As he gets more frustrated she tells him “it’s ok- you’ll get it- this isn’t rocket science.”
There is an awkward pause as her student stares back at her."No" he agrees, "this isn’t rocket science. That I can do. This is some sadistic step designed specifically to torture rocket scientists.”
And that’s how we found out he worked for NASA.

thejunglenook:

ballpointpun:

Somewhere a rocket scientist brain surgeon physicist with a knack for economics who wears Velcro shoes is having a stress breakdown.

When I was a professional ballroom dance instructor, one of my coworkers was having a tough time teaching a step to her student. As he gets more frustrated she tells him “it’s ok- you’ll get it- this isn’t rocket science.”

There is an awkward pause as her student stares back at her.
"No" he agrees, "this isn’t rocket science. That I can do. This is some sadistic step designed specifically to torture rocket scientists.”

And that’s how we found out he worked for NASA.

fallenangelflonne:

aknowlee:

basedmountaindew:

kaldriss:

>tell my girl i love subs
>she thinkin i wanna dominate her in bed
>god damn i love sandwiches

>tell my girl i love subs
>she thinkin i wanna dominate her in bed
>god damn i cant stand dubbed anime

>tell my girl i love subs
>she thinkin i wanna dominate her in bed
>god damn i hope my real teacher never comes back

>tell my girl i love subs
>she thinkin i wanna dominate her in bed
>i’m 20,000 leagues under the fucking sea

compliment:

do you ever want to sleep for 14 years without waking up

rachreilly:

when someone tries to spill the truth tea but you’re not ready to be scalded

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itstimeforcomics:

i dont remember making this

itstimeforcomics:

i dont remember making this

crrocs:

so i tried to make this deep and meaningful and added a water gif

crrocs:

so i tried to make this deep and meaningful and added a water gif

koolaidicecubes:

goldenclitoris:

watch out i m a professional flirter *winks with both eyes*

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mysticmoonhigh:

rubee:

what the fuck how is he putting his arm through the cat and it doesn’t even care

You clearly don’t own a cat

mysticmoonhigh:

rubee:

what the fuck how is he putting his arm through the cat and it doesn’t even care

You clearly don’t own a cat